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Keep me ‘ghosted’

Submitted by Alex Vandiver on March 28, 2016 – 10:30 amNo Comment

So here is the thing, in this day and age if you don’t know what ghosting is, then you are probably fooling yourself or you just live under a rock. Ghosting is just the modern definition for ‘hey I don’t really want to date you but am too scared to actually let you know’. Honestly, I hate this, because as a modern generation we are way better than this.

But the problem I have more than the act itself, is how much we let it get to us emotionally. When someone we were absolutely crazy about just vanishes, it messes with our head and confidence. In a time where apps like OK Cupid and Tinder make relationships disposable, we have to break the cycle.

That guy or gal you spent all that time on, dates, late night conversations, yeah remember them? They couldn’t even bother to send you a text, call you, Facebook you or heck even send a carrier pigeon your way. So do you actually really want to date somebody like this? Relationships are about communication and whoever you date should have the integrity and compassion to have the hard talks with you.

So when somebody “ghosts” you they just proved that they definitely can’t communicate with you or take on adult responsibility. No matter how well things were going, something clicked with them and they vanished. From firsthand experience of being one of the ghosted, you will literally question everything you ever did around them. Don’t beat yourself up about everything but do gain some self-awareness. Because what significant other is worth being around if they destroy your confidence and make you question yourself constantly?

People that do this aren’t in a good place, and if you are somebody that does this, shame on you. You don’t just drop off the face of the earth. Just say you aren’t interested politely. The adult dating world is full of confrontation and if you can’t handle it you are just making our generation look bad. With the growth of online dating, empathy has declined. In this day and age nobody likes to talk and it’s becoming a major problem.

So the next time you get ghosted, it’s okay to be upset.  You were interested in somebody and they let you down. But they proved that they weren’t ready for a relationship. Just remember that you, don’t let it get to you. Move on and find somebody who is really worth your time.

 

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